Penguin Random House Barry Is Not Making This Up

• a U.S. Supreme Court justice shares his remedy for preventing gas ("I had not realized that this was a matter of concern in the highest levels of government")

• a newspaper headline in Ohio announces the combustibility of strawberry Pop-Tarts ("A story that can really help you gain a better understanding of how you can be killed by breakfast snack food")

• a frightening fact that snakes have mastered the pipelines leading directly to your toilet—and they're not shy ("Many women might view this as a fair punishment for all the billions of times that guys have left the seat up").